Phonetic Smellings

pie monster from here.

Pumpkin Pie From Scratch

I’ve been trying to suss a good recipe for pumpkin pie for a few years now, and it never seems to come out right. Making a decent pumpkin pie from scratch has proved to be pretty difficult, at least for me. Well, I think I got it this year. So I am going to document it here so I don’t ever forget it now that it’s come to me. I know that this is a big endeavor, and pumpkins have a relatively short season, so if anyone does take this recipe and make it, I would love to hear about it. Cheers!

Ingredients

Roasted Pumpkin

· 1 sugar pie pumpkin   · olive oil   · kosher salt

Pie Guts

· 1 pie crust (see below)   · 1/2 cup brown sugar   · 1 tbs cassia cinnamon   · 1/2 ts allspice   · 1/4 ts cloves   · 1ts ground ginger   · 1 ts salt   · 1tbs cornstarch   · 1 1/2 cups roasted pumpkin puree (see above)   · 1 1/2 ts vanilla extract   · 3 large eggs   · 1 cup coconut milk

Pie Dough

· 2 cups all purpose flour   · 1/2 cup almond meal · 1 1/2 sticks of butter   · 1 ts salt · 1/3 cup cold water, a bit more if needed once mixing

Roasted Pumpkin

First, make sure you have the right pumpkin. This won’t work with a larger on that you might carve. You want the smaller pumpkins, usually indicated as ‘pie’ pumpkins. The larger ones just don’t taste the same, and you won’t want to eat it.

I usually roast the pumpkin the day before I am going to make the pie, for no reason other than this takes awhile to make.

Preheat oven to 400º. *Carefully* cut the pumpkin into a few large wedges. Clean it out, and cut a few more times. Drizzle with olive oil and rub it all over the pumpkin. Sprinkle salt all over. The salt really brings out the taste, so feel free to go a bit nuts. Bake for a little over an hour. You should easily be able to poke the meat with a fork. When it’s done, let it cool a bit. Scoop out the meat and discard the skin. Now, I like to use a blender or food processor to turn the pumpkin into a smooth puree. Many recipes say to hand mash or use a hand blender. Both of these methods can leave stringy bits of pumpkin in the final pie. But mash it how you will. The extras can be made into soup, cupcakes, pancakes – there’s a lot you can do with pumpkin. Anyways, back to the pie…

Doh!

This is my favorite pie crust recipe to date. The almond meal can be made with a food processor – go at it until the pieces are very fine, or I found them conveniently in Trader Joe’s baking section. If you must forgo this bit, add another 1/2 cup of flour to the mix.

Dissolve the salt in the cold water. In a large bowl, cut in the shortening with the flour. Add the salted water and roll up your sleeves. I use my hands to mash this dough into a consistent blob. When it’s all mixed together, cover the top of the bowl and throw this in the fridge for 3-4 hours. Leave overnight if you wish, but take out a half hour before using so that the dough is more pliable.

Pi

Preheat the oven to 350º. Roll out the dough for your 9-10 inch pie. Press it into the pie plate. trim the edges, and pierce throughout with a fork. Set aside.

Blend everything for the pie guts together with a hand whisk or mixer, dry ingredients first, then wet. When smooth and well combined, pour into the pie plate. Cook for about 50 minutes. The measure of doneliness is that if you move the pie, the middle barely jiggles. Cool it for a couple of hours before you try to cut into it. And quit.

Notes

The pie dough was altered for this recipe. The actual amounts that I have written down are as follows: 5 cups pastry flour (or 4.5 all purpose) sifted, 3/4 lbs butter (3 sticks), 2 tsp salt, and 3/4 cup cold water. This makes *a lot* of dough though, so use this if you’re making more than one pie.

My friends and I recently had a burger competition. There were spinach artichoke burgers, chocolate prune burgers, curried mushroom burgers, juicy lucys, and green chili and white cheddar burgers. No burger lacked deliciousness. It was great to see what people came up with and spend all day cooking and eating with friends. I decided to post my entry here. Perhaps more of the participants will post their burger recipes later. Let me know what you think!

The Honey Beet Burger

There are no quantitative measurements here. When it comes to burger making, I really believe that one should just eye the ingredients and add to taste. I like to smell the spice, then imagine the taste with what I am putting together in my head. I’ve never made the same burger twice, but that’s what makes them good.

The beets —

·Fresh beets skinned and cut into slices   · Honey

Put a bit of water (about an inch deep) into a pan. Insert the above ingredients and simmer for about 20 minutes, preferably with a lid on top.

The Bacon —

· Bacon

Thick is best, but whatever you got. Preheat oven to 400º. Put bacon on pans. If you have the pastry drying sheets, put the bacon on that with the pan under it. Though not necessary, this will make your bacon less greasy and more crisp/delicious. Bake for 15 to 18 minutes, until done to your liking. Philistines, feel free to cook your bacon in the microwave.

The Burger Bit —

· Ground Sirloin   · Molasses   · Cardamom   · Thai Chili Garlic Sauce   · Teriyaki   · Worcestershire Sauce   · Paprika   · Chili Powder   · Mustard Powder   · Finely Chopped Onions

Mix all this stuff in a big bowl with your hands. Keep on until you’re sure everything is spread uniformly.

The rub —

· Cardamom   · Cracked Pepper  · Cracked Rosemary   · Celery Salt
Get a large plate, and put these down on it. Your burger will be making out with this savory concoction shortly.

The Patty Part —

· Chévre

Separate the meat into balls for each patty. Don’t be perfect about, this is just to lay out the correct amounts. Grab one patty ball and split it in half.grab a wad of the chévre and stuff it in the middle of one half. Take the other half and form it on top. pat this into your patty. Roll it on top of the rub, and pat the rub into the burger. Slap it on the grill. Do this for each patty.

Putting It Together —

· Endive   · Dijon Mustard   · Brioche Rolls (or something similar) · Lemon

Cut the rolls/buns open. Put dijon mustard on top. Lay the endive on top of that. Cross the bacon on the bottom bun. Put the burger on top of the bacon, and lay some of the beets on top of that. Squeeze a bit of lemon on top of the endive. drizzle honey over the beets and serve.

I’ve been told by a few that mine is the best, so I’ll share the recipe here. Total cooking and prep time, about an hour.

Indrediments:

You’ll need a large wok for this, and a separate pan for the tofu.
1/4 cup sesame oil
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup soy sauce
2-3 cloves of garlic
1 small red bell pepper
1 small yellow onion
6-8 button mushrooms
1/2 teaspoon of cumin
1/2 brick extra firm tofu
3 eggs (leave out to keep it vegan)
4 cups of cooked long grain white rice (Follow the package directions. I’ll skip this part.)

Prep Talk

Drain the tofu well a couple of heavy plates and clean white clothes.

Combine the oils, sugar, and soy sauce in a small dish or cup and set to the side for later while the tofu is draining. It will settle, don’t worry about it.

Cut the pepper, onion, and mushrooms into very small pieces, no bigger than a quarter inch or so. Slice the tofu into small quarter inch cubes. Peel the garlic, but keep it whole.

Cooking it all up

In the wok, add half of the oil/soy/sugar mixture to a heated pan while whisking it. Once the oil is moderately hot, add the garlic cloves for about 30-60 seconds. Mash the garlic with a fork once soft, and immediately add the vegeatables and mushrooms. Cook these up just a bit (a few minutes) and keep stirring them in the process. Now is a good time to make sure your other pan is nice and hot.

Add the tofu to the hot skillet, dusting it with the cumin, and cook just until it begins to brown. About 7 minutes should do it. Once its a nice brown, you can remove from the heat and set to the side. Note: You can cook this in the same pan as the vegetables, but I like to keep my tofu solid, and this tends to help.

In the wok, add about a cup of the cooked rice, and the rest of the oil mixture, mixing everything together well with the veggies. Add the rest of the rice, and stir it all together, just until well mixed. Keep the heat on very high, and press the rice down into the pan. After 3 minutes or so, Scrape it all up from the bottom of the pan, and mix it all up again. Repeat about 5 times.

Once the rice gets a bit of a golden color, its time to add the eggs. Make a well in the center of your wok with a spatula, and break your three eggs right in the middle of your pan. Be prepared to scramble the eggs quickly, as your wok should still be very hot! It should take no more than 60 seconds to cook the eggs up, and you can then stir everything back together.

Add the tofu to the rice, and stir it in together gently, just long enough to warm the tofu. Voila. More of my non-traditional asian-inspired cooking for you to enjoy.

Ideas

I have used all kinds of other veggies with this, so feel free to use whatever you want. Just make sure don’t use too few or too many vegtables, or the texture will be off. Personal favorites to use are carrots (cook these a bit longer), bamboo shoots, and julienned portabella mushrooms.

I usually serve make this with a vegetable stir fry with the same veggies as above and Quorn Naked Chik’n, which you can start cooking right about when you add the rice, and have it all ready together.  Some cumin, cayenne, and just a touch of teriaki sauce makes it interesting.

I failed at these. Horribly. I tried this recipe: http://www.cooks.com/rec/doc/0,1825,145160-252203,00.html to no avail. I tried my own, using a mix of flakes, bisquick, and some other ingredients, and it still tasted like poop. Anyone have a good recipe to make potato pancakes without using real spuds?

My Uncle Nommin A Footlong

Good post by my friend Adrian, over at his blog HipHopNerd:

The Hunt For Red Hots

Yorkshire Pudding is a traditional British dish, originating from – of course – Yorkshire. I got a hankerin’ and had to have some. But I’ve never actually seen proper Yorkshire Pudding in the states. Below is my interpretation of several recipes combined.

Ingredients:

· a scant cup of flour

· 1/2 tsp salt

· 2 eggs

· 1 – 1¼ cups milk

· 4 tbsp oil or lard

Directions:

Mix the eggs, one cup of milk, and salt. Gradually add in the flour. The consistency should be relatively that of heavy cream. Add up to the extra ¼ cup if needed. Make sure all the lumps are out. Cover this and let it sit in the fridge for at least two hours.

Preheat the oven to 450º. In a muffin pan with 12 units, disperse the oil or lard evenly to each compartment. Lard is recommended as it’s smoking temperature is higher, but I use the more convenient oil and it works just fine. Put just this in the oven for 5 minutes. The oil will get hot and probably smoke. Take out the batter and mix it again to make sure it hasn’t seperated at all. When you are ready, pull the oven rack out, but don’t move the pan – keep it ready to close up in the oven. Disperse the batter evenly and close it in the oven. Cook for 15-20 minutes without opening the oven door, Sylvia Plath. They will rise and collapse a bit in the middle. They are meant to be a bit misshapen. The consistency is bready and a bit crunchy on the outside and gooey like pudding on the inside. Take them out and serve right away.

Variations:

You could make the same batter, and put it in an 8×8x2 inch pan, bake it the same, and cut it into squares when done. I prefer the muffin pan, because you get more bready and less puddingy. Another fun way to cook this is in a pie pan, so it comes out in a circle. Then you can put beef and gravy on top of it and it is like a Yorkshire Pudding bowl. This is a common way to serve it in pubs. So yes, this is great with gravy. You can also pour this over sausages and make Toad In The Hole.

Yorkshire Pudding is also delicious with fruits, powder sugar, and sweet couplings. Use your imagination. One you taste this puddin’, you’ll think of all sorts of things you can do with it!

If this wasn’t British enough for you, then we have:

The Mushy Pea Debacle

During this stint of anglophilism, I also wanted to make mushy peas. Traditionally, there is no food processor involved in this. You get dried peas and soak them overnight with 2tsp of baking soda, then rinse and cook them for 20 minutes in water just covering them. I followed this direction, and the process was very interesting. I set the peas up and covered them overnight. In the morning, they looked as though they had not broken down at all. I was worried. The time came to cook them, and I figured that I’d boil them for 20 minutes, and if I ended up with just plain peas that would be just as well. I kept close watch over the peas as they boiled. A light foam rose to the top from the left over baking soda. The peas remained in tact. Between 18 and 19 minutes I checked the starting football game. When I came back the peas were completely broken down and mushy. The consistency was spot on, and became so in an instant. But this culinary experiment was not a success. They just didn’t taste right. All the mushy peas I had in pubs were kind of sweet. These were sulfuric, almost like a mushed up hard boiled egg. If anyone has a solution to this, please let me know! I think it may just be that I used a different kind of pea than is common across the pond but I can’t be sure. I do know, that I am going to avoid trying to make mushy peas unless I get better information!

This is one of my favorites, and is completely original. Not difficult to make, but it is a bit more involved than say, buying McDonalds.

Fixins:

1 28 oz jar Sweet Baby Rays (I would recommend against substitution here)
2 medium granny smith apples (or your favorite tart apple)
1 medium red delicious (or your favorite sweet apple)
1 tbsp red wine or balsamic vinegar
2 tbsp brown sugar
1/4 tsp chili powder
1 small serrano or habeñaro pepper, or 1 dash of Tabasco. (Choose your hotness)
2 lbs chicken breast (4-6 pieces)
cooking oil
1 clove garlic, chopped

Fixing:

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.

Cut the apples up into large bite size pieces. I like to have about 6 pieces per chicken breast, so use that as an approximate measure depending on how many pieces of chicken you have.

In a large saucepan, combine about 24 oz of the barbecue sauce, the apple pieces, vinegar, brown sugar, chili powder, and pepper (or pepper sauce). Bring to almost boiling. Simmer uncovered at a very low heat for 20-25 minutes. Once the apples are soft enough to mash with a fork/spoon, but still firm enough to retain their shape, remove from heat and cover.

While waiting for the sauce to finish, prepare a non-stick, or foil lined baking sheet by placing a tablespoon size dollop of the remaining barbecue sauce for each chicken breast. You can make the foil tent now (see below) as well, if you like. (Pro tip: The foil tent can be prepared up to 10 years in advance if properly stored).

Heat a few tablespoons of cooking oil until very hot. Water droplets splashed onto the oil should vaporize instantly. Toss the chopped garlic in for just a few seconds to extract the flavor, and fry the chicken breasts, 2-3 at a time, JUST until they have a nice brown color on each side. About 2-3 minutes per side. The chicken will NOT be cooked through, so please handle as you would raw chicken. Place each browned breast, lovingly, in the spots you previously created for them.

Spoon the Apple Barbecue sauce mixture evenly over all the chicken breasts, and cover with a foil tent. Essentially, you are bending and molding the aluminum foil so that direct, dry heat is not hitting the chicken and sauce, but the foil is also not touching the chicken or sauce… experiment a bit for your favorite way to do this. You can also use a metal cake pan if you have one as large as your baking sheet.

Bake for 20-25 minutes, or until chicken reaches an internal temparature of 165 degrees.

Notes

I usually make this with oven broiled asparagus seasoned with rock salt, and hard irish cheddar. This is a very sweet, and very spicy dish, so the saltiness contrasts well with it. A nice big baked potato with cheese and sour cream goes quite well with this as well.

You can also make this on the grill, though make sure to use foil, and make a “ridge” so as not to lose all the sauce, as it does begin to run.

Roasted Root Vegetables

Heat oven to 450º. Cut all vegetables into bite-sized pieces & toss with olive oil to lightly coat. Roast as follows, stirring every 10-15 minutes.

To a large roasting pan, add as follows:

·beets   ·jicama   ·rutabagas   ·potatoes   ·yams   ·carrots

After 15 minutes, add:

·radishes   ·turnips   ·parsnips   ·whole garlic cloves

After 40 minutes, add:

·mushrooms   ·sprigs of rosemary & thyme   ·sea salt   ·pepper

Finish cooking for 20 minutes, or until vegetable are easily forked. Total cooking time is about an hour and fifteen. Prep time will depend on the quality of your knife and the strength of your arms.

Agedashi Tofu

Thank you to the wonderfully masterful “Chef BeatSurrender” for the invite to this culinary explosion. I’m very excited to share what I’ve discovered through much trial and error in the World of Food. For purposes of introductory posts, I will keep it simple and share my slightly modified take on this tasty Japanese classic.

MainFood:

6 oz extra firm tofu (1/2 store bought brick)
1/2 c. wheat flour (the traditional is corn starch, use this if you like)
1-2 cups of vegetable oil

SauceFood:

1/4 c. balsamic vinegar (or red wine vinegar, if budgeted)
1 clove garlic, minced or mashed
1/4 ts garlic salt
2 tbs brown sugar
1/4 ts vegetable oil (3 drops or so)

GarnishFood:

(optional)
1/2 cup Toasted Coconut
1/8 Green Onion, Chopped

MakeFood:

Keep the tofu COLD until you’re ready. Feel free to read ahead if you must

Prepare the sauce first, as the tofu is meant to be served piping hot. Take all of your sauce ingredients, mix them up a bit with a fork, and throw them in a blender or food processor. The sauce will be thin, but the few drops of oil help blend everything together nicely. You can mix this by hand if you like, but omit the oil, and expect a very thin sauce.

Get a solid, deep frying pan, and fill it up to about 1/2 inch with vegetable oil, and get it nice and hot. The basic frying rule applies here: If you throw a drop of water in the oil and it spats at you like crazy and gets pissed, you’re ready.

Drain the tofu very well. Wrapping it in a clean, lint free cloth and putting a slight amount of weight (dinner plate?) on top helps to speed up this process. Cut the brick into sushi bite size pieces, making sure that they are no deeper than twice the depth of the oil. I usually opt for a nice little 1/2 inch by 1/2 inch by 1 inch rectangle or so. You should get about 12-16 out of your half brick.

Coat the pieces lightly with the flour by dabbing them on all four sides. Shake them off a bit so there are no clumps, and get excited already! This is going to be tasty! Plop them lovingly in the oil, being careful not to crowd the pan. Keeping the oil hot is key! After 2.5 minutes, flip them over with chopsticks, or something else very gentle so as not to puncture them. Another 2.5 minutes, and they’re done. Let them drain a bit on a paper towel or something of the sort.

FinishFood:

Drizzle a generous amount of the sauce on a serving plate, and arrange the beautiful golden squares however you like. Drizzle a small amount of sauce on top if you like (I don’t), and garnish with the toasted coconut and chopped green onions if you chose to include them.

NoteFood:

I make these for people who say they “don’t like tofu” all the time, then go into a rant about how pretty much nobody can say they “don’t like tofu”, until they’ve tried it at least 10 different way. I usually get looks that imply “I hate you, you elitist” or something of the such. However, they still eat the agedashi, and love it.

Contents:

1 1/2 c. flour

3 1/2 ts baking powder

1 ts salt

2 tbs sugar

2 ts cinnamon

1 c. buttermilk

1/2 c. milk

1 egg

3tbs butter, melted

Get the pan ready, turn the fire on medium. Mix all the dry ingredients, then add the wet ingredients. This mix should be fairly liquid. If it doesn’t drip easily off the spoon, add more milk. The pan is ready if you flick some water on it, and it boils away right away. Butter the pan a bit to ease up the friction. Spoon the desired amount into the pan. I usually do about 5 tbs for a medium sized pancake. If you go larger, they can become difficult to flip without a decent spatula.

Know when to say when! You should see bubbles showing through the batter when it’s ready to flip. If you are able to easily get the spatula under the pancake, and move it around a bit, then it’s ready to flip. Let it cook until it’s the desired brown, then you’re set!

Tips: I keep the cakes on a plate in the oven, turned to 150º until they’re all ready.

If the pan gets too hot, the outside will burn or the insides won’t cook. Turn the fire off and let it cool if the pan seems to be getting too hot. You can still cook while the fires off and the pan is cooling down.

I think left over pancakes are gross, but if you want to keep the left overs, go right ahead. Or store the batter as air-tight as possible, and make them fresh sometime in the next two days.

Extra Extra: Mix in anything with these pancakes, as long as the batter keeps a drippy consistency. Bananas are a favorite. Blueberries with lemon zest. oatmeal and/or nuts. I like to put fresh strawberries or blackberries and put them on top, not inside the cake. And sausage and syrups are always necessary when consuming pancakes.

Related Fact: Closing pitcher for the Chicago White Sox, Bobby Scott Jenks, is nicknamed “The Pancake.”

Thanks for reading! What would you add/change?